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It’s quiet wonder and deep rooted joy that I get in my vegetable garden with my dog by my side. My joy is found in in the certainty of the  love of God that I have come to know through Jesus. This is deeper than happiness, something more like a constant contentment deep in the soul.
Like a moment when a Swallowtail butterfly alights upon you, or a bird comes right up close to take a look at you, that sudden, thrilling moment of connectedness with everything- with ALL life- and beyond. As a New Zealander, getting a bit fucked up in nature brings me a huge amount of joy. As has happened so many times, your question finds me at the exact right moment. I was going about my morning routine today, and wondering why I 2nd hand bags am so often such a joyless bastard.

This morning, like most, I was riding my bike to work. One of my retirement gigs is substitute teaching, and today’s route took me along, and then across a local park/golf course. Something in the quiet and the particular angle of the morning light recalled the time I’d seen a pair of coyotes crossing the park. And less than half a minute later a beautiful coyote crossed the path right in front of me, golden, sleek, and radiating wildness. The universe is mysterious that way.
I used to dread dusting this area, there are just so many pictures to move. The frames are awkward shapes and sizes, some are heavy. Then I made a point to really look at each picture as I dusted it and over time this has become a weekly gratitude practice for me.I pick up the nearest picture, my mother, taken from this world too soon and without warning. My first great loss, now decades in the past and just yesterday. I remember taking this photograph.

The second place I find joy, and this is a different kind of joy, is being with or near animals and nature. Wild creatures, the birds in my garden, my dog. I love watching them, especially when they're wild, and being near them. It's a different kind of joy though, one that comes from being quiet and observing. Animals often regard us with such scepticism and I think its humbling to recognise and acknowledge that they are just like us, creatures, trying to make a go of it.
I find joy in lots of things but most - in sadness. I like being carried away by a sad song. I've bet it all on music and now I'm sowing - I can't do almost anything if there is no music playing at the background. Without this - without the endearing feeling of hopelessness - my life would not have been fulfilled. This is often a very fleeting state for me as the self loathing is never far away. Still, while there is joy  there is hope.
Around 10 years or so ago my mood became quite low, and for no particular reason that I could explain. Everything in my life felt like a chore. I struggled with doing the simple things in life, I cut myself off from friends and family and everything felt so bleak. I didn’t really know what to do or where I wanted to be. In a single moment of clarity and what I feel was a saving grace for me was that I found an old packet of flower seeds, and I decided to grow them. I remember thinking that by the time the flowers bloomed I would feel better.

I dampen down the will to procreate excessively with visualisations and meditation. I gain great joy continually and every day running the grand trick on my body and look forward to subtly different tricks I will play to lead a calmer, less destructive and carnal life. I also enjoy the arts where they do not deny our darker natures, and celebrate our wins and losses, such as the many works of one N.Cave. I find joy in the small things in life. Once I thought joy would be found in life’s many accomplishments. But after the end of a 17 year marriage, career change, finding love (after believing it no longer existed), I become content in my place in life.
It  may last no longer than a few seconds but has the capacity to lift me up into the day. A streak of sunlight that flashes through a grey sky, the smell of green after a storm or just that feeling that all is as it should be. I don't seek joy, it finds me in these moments. When l catch my daughter Silver smiling at me when l’m busying around her.

Seeing our daughter happy and developing into an adult brings joy. I often struggle with how to find joy. I mean, I have very depressive episodes where I’m really not interested in anything and just waste away. Then I always have to make a conscious effort to remember what it is that brings me joy. When I remember, though, and actively look for it, I find my joy in many, mostly small things.
It remains joyous even in its most melancholic form. I’m 76 and a published poet and passionate songster (I don’t call myself a musician). I’ve lived long enough to know personally the losses and subtractions that come with age, both personally and by association. These losses intensify the need for joy which, as you say, can’t be achieved passively in this world.

But I have 4 beautiful children and love comes in many forms. What has kept me alive has been the realisation that I am lucky to have my children.  I have lived to the age of 58 and my dad died at 40. Jane Austen wrote about love and yet she didn't get the love that she wrote about.
Joy is the eternal dance partner of Gratitude. The dance begins with cognisance. Gratitude leads with its strength, and Joy follows with its exuberance. It is the simplest of dances but sometimes we get overwhelmed by life and in sorrow we forget the steps. But it will always be there for the taking. Gratitude will lead and Joy will follow.
Sometimes we believe that in order to feel joy, we must encounter or achieve something extraordinary. We fear that by allowing ourselves to find joy in simple, ordinary things, we ourselves, our lives become ordinary. The more I learn to let go of that fear, the more joyful I find my life to be.P.S. Books are an endless source of joy.